Thursday, December 29, 2005


(…as we’ve been told by the ladies…)

Warriors 111, Celtics 109.

It was an HBN nite at the Oakland Coliseum, as Atma, Hash, and I took a time out from the mundane activities of everyday work life to check out the Warriors, also known as “a great time out.” As Atma says, this is real “live coverage.”

I haven’t been to a Warriors game in over a year and I haven’t seen the Warriors win a game at the coliseum in almost 2 years—meaning I’ve watched them lose close to 5 or 6 times in a row in person. Fresh off their 5 game losing streak, the thing I looked forward to the most was 1) Warriors girls, their hot outfits, and their award winning choreography 2) hot dogs and garlic fries 3) the legendary Smirnoff Lounge and 4) high fives galore from random drunk fans!

Luckily, Atma, Hash and I experienced all 4 and the win!

The game looked vaguely reminiscent to a ABA game with neither team playing any defense; as usual, this meant the Warriors let the least expecting player light them up for a career nite or season high. Tonite it was Mark Blount. It seems that every game, the Warriors manage to let some garbage dude or dudes look like all-stars. The list includes Samuel Dalembert, Voshon Leonard (40 pts in the 1st half alone), Skita (when he was still with Denver—scoring 15 pts in 10 minutes once), and the list goes on and on. This is the type of consistency, as fans, do NOT want to see.

In the first half, HBN and many other fans were quick to boo Dunleavy's poor shooting and poor judgment with the ball. Atma yelled out “TRADE HIM!” A fan in front of us quickly turned and responded in Dun’s defense “FOR WHAT?”

Me: cheerleaders
Atma: Hot Dogs

Coliseum hot dogs are BANK, if we could trade dunleavy’s 44 million to lower the price of food, I’d instantly award Mullin with the GM of the Year award—though he deserves consideration already for his wheeling and dealing for the superb cheerleaders; picking of the hooker-esque outfits for the cheerleaders; the Smirnoff lounge that rivals any club in Oakland (Kimballs East got nothing on this!); and the fine (yet overly priced) merchandise.

Midway through the first half, this little kid—after hearing Atma, Hash and I talk some trash about Dunleavy—says to me “We should trade Dunleavy for Artest!” He obviously knew we were HBN and was just trying to get in good with us. But he definitely knew his basketball more than the dude in front of us who questioned our comments earlier. This kid even yelled out “We want Pietrus!” before the game started! Contrary to what some Fans consider “negativity”, I believe demanding a trade or playing Pietrus more is considered “strategizing.” Besides, as people constantly say in this industry: it’s nothing personal, its just business. Right? Anyway, my point with this kid is that the HBN has groupies or people who want to be our groupies everywhere we go.

At half time, Atma and Hash showed me the Smirnoff Lounge—the swankiest spot in the East Bay. I felt like I really “made it” when it came to being a true “Warriors” fan. There was this scary looking older Korean woman that I kept seeing all nite, who I then ran into in the Smirnoff lounge, who was dressed as if she was doing a dragon lady impersonation—low cut sequined dress and eyebrows slanted like she had constantly angry . Funny though was that she was with this plain goofy looking older Korean man who you might mistaken to be any Asian kids dad.

In the second half, Dunleavy continued to infuriate fans with his poor judgment. Several series in a row, Dunleavy dropped a point blank pass in the paint; flopped then called for a foul; passed up a shot leading to a shot clock violation; and then passed up a shot deep in the paint, which culminated with fans vociferously booing him and then Dunleavy throwing his hands up mouthing something to the crowd. I’m speculating it was “I’m sorry! I just hella suck!” He drained a three possessions later mouthing something to fan (news reports say he told them to “calm down”), then completely airballed a three right after. I echo what the woman behind me—who happened to talk some crazy trash about Dunleavy throughout the game—said:


But seriously, the highlight from the night came towards the end as a series of clutch Warrior plays that lead to several fans around us offering us some high five. For the first time in over two years, the trip to the Oakland Coliseum was truly a “GREAT TIME OUT!”

Instead of playing some D, he's too busy posing for the camera

Warrior Game Summaries from local press:
Foyle not wrapped up in self-pity
Fisher's clutch layup ends Warriors' skid at five
Warriors Pull One Out


At 11:24 AM, Blogger spchrist said...

the Warriors are looking pretty good this year. Maybe next season, I will draft a few players on my fantasy basketball team.

At 2:42 PM, Blogger Kirkkazas said...

Was the Korean woman good-looking? I don't really get the dragon-lady Asian stereotypes. I just want to know if she was good-looking.

what's with the W's matador defense? have they just given up on Defense or have other teams adjusted to their previous tough
D when they opened the season.

kirk kazuaki

At 4:05 PM, Blogger dj fuzzylogic said...

she might have been good looking about 10-20 years ago. now, she's just plain scary! what i meant to say was that she looked like she was impersonating a dragon lady sterotype, not that she was a dragon lady.
good lookin out kirk.

At 7:24 PM, Blogger LancerEvoV said...

I laughed out loud when you mentioned the Warrior Girls' "award winning choreography." The Junior Jam Squad OWNS the Warrior Girls when it comes to dancing.

At 7:28 PM, Blogger dubspinners said...

you serious? warrior girls are F-L-Y!

At 8:05 PM, Blogger fantasy junkie said...

haha lancerevov is on point. the warrior girls need some work on that choreography. i'm not sure they know what a straight line looks like or for that matter a circle, a square, or what being in sync means. (i get a good view of these geometric shapes sitting way high up in the rafters).

but props to the warriors girls for having some fly asians.

At 1:50 PM, Blogger Kirkkazas said...

does HBN stand for Home Boys Night out or something like that?

At 6:54 PM, Blogger dj fuzzylogic said...

From the Warriors website:

"The Warrior Girls are a magnificent melting pot of energy, beauty and most of all talent! The 2005-06 season will mark the 21st year the Warrior Girls have been an explosive and valuable entity of the Golden State Warriors " Great Time-Out". Their collective talents include, jazz, hip-hop, ballet, lyrical, Hawaiian Hula and Modern dance."

Word. Lookin as good as they do, they could be doing jumping jacks and still make it seem like choreography!


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